Using the Virtual Verandah


The Rules

  1. Be kind. Understand that we’re all doing the best that we can.

  2. No bullying, sexism, racism etc. We're here to help each other out, not denigrate others. Its negative and unhelpful.

  3. No trash talking. About any other person, organisation, group or entity.

  4. What's said in our online support, stays in our online support. We take this very seriously. This means no recording of any kind, screenshots, copy & paste, downloading of photos without permission etc. Unlike many social media platforms (e.g. Facebook, Twitter etc.), in ours the content belongs to us and we can action it legally. We do not need to rely on a big faceless organisation in another country to get a prosecution or civil action completed. Privacy is critical and we will take all steps to protect it, everytime.

  5. No spam. Generally speaking, no advertising is allowed. Where it is, it needs to be a positive service that helps builds and does not detract from anyone else. This generally goes for services, events, fundraisers, products, support groups, men’s / women's groups, commercial or activist websites, etc. If you’re not sure, please ask our friendly admin team for permission. We will normally say yes.

  6. Don't fix. Just like in our meetings, no teaching or advising. Sharing of your own experience, wisdom, questions and vulnerability is very much welcome. People like to learn from you, not be told what to do or to become dependant upon your expertise. Fixing others prevents them developing self reflection and resilience.

  7. Be respectful. Healthy debate is encouraged. However rude or abusive behaviour/ language will not be tolerated. We all don’t have to agree. Respectful difference of opinion is our goal here.

  8. Engage brain before writing. We invest a great deal of thought and energy into creating and managing a safe platform where you don't need to worry too much but, privacy also ultimately rests with the individual. It is wise not to write anything in a public space that you don’t want your child, former partner, lawyer, judge, or grandmother reading, now or some time in the future.

  9. Don't be 'that person' in the room: We reserve the right to remove, block, suspend and limit any member and to not provide a reason for doing so. That said, it's not what we like doing and usually, we first issue polite warnings. We don't have to. Just, don't be that person.

  10. Catch all rule: If ever in doubt, refer rule #1.

Joining an online meeting - DADS

All DIDs online meetings are listed in the calendar HERE (scroll down page to view calendar).

Joining an online meeting - MUMS

Find the link to join MIDs online meeting HERE.


You'll see hashtags listed in the pinned post at the top of the Virtual Verandah. These are the main ones, not all of them.

You can click on these to quickly/easily find all related posts.

You can add these or your own hashtags to any post to make it easier for others to find by subject or location. (e.g. #csa, #tas, #cairns, #familylaw etc...)

We're a national group so regional hashtags help others in your area see what's going on locally

Questions / Suggestions / Problems ?

Reach out to any admin of the group for help.

On the web version, click on the members link at the top of the page under the image banner, then select admins

On mobile devices, click the circled 'i' on the banner image at the top of the group, then members and admins

Need more help outside the group?

Call 1300 853437, Monday to Saturday, 09:00-17:00 NSW/VIC timezone


Check out our website (you're in it right now) for details of current support services.

Why do we use MeWe?

We've explored and experimented with various platforms before we settled on MeWe.

All options that we considered had unique benefits and varied risks or downsides.

Key users requirements we identified were (1) very easy of use, (2) mobile app available, (3) high safety/security, (4) free of charge.

MeWe was the only solution that ticked every box. It's a very Facebook like environment with which most people are comfortable but without the serious privacy issues.

Do online groups replace real world support?

No, they offer complimentary support between meetings and support for those not near local meetings.

There's nothing quite like a real world support group meeting if you've never been to one! Try it.

However, during the current COVID19 pandemic, this is the only medium we are meeting through. Its temporary.

The groups come back as soon as it's safe to do so and this online support continues too.